Friday, October 22, 2010

Another uneasy decision

I saw my radiation onc today, Dr. K, for another consultation. He recommended that although surgery was a viable next step, radiation was recommended. It's all up to me, of course, but the decision is never about certainties or hard evidence.

The type of cancer I have looks and acts like inflammatory breast cancer (best not to Google image that one) in that it presented itself as a superficial change (redness, swelling, heat) before a distinct lump appeared (or two in my case) and it was super-fast growing. Technically it's not inflammatory, but they pushed ahead with chemo first as if it was. And in typical bad-ass inflammatory style, they're now saying radiation would be best to shrink the arses down to nothing before cutting the offending breast off.

My surgeon, Dr. R, says she'd be happy if I decided on surgery next, but is also fine with radiation. It's not black & white. And again, it's up to me. But of course she'd say that - a surgeon would never admit they aren't ready to cut.

In all, the docs are happy about the shrinkage, but not dancing in the streets. They want both tatas to look exactly alike or very similar before they break out the bubbly.

So around three weeks after my final chemo in late November I will begin five weeks of daily radiation - about 30-40 minutes each day. My skin will be destroyed, which will make surgery and eventual reconstruction a bit more rough (and rough-looking for you modelling agents out there), but from what it sounds like, that's the biggest drawback to having radiation before surgery. If so, I can take that.

And if I'm going to be all pro and con about it all, I'd rather be recovering from radiation treatments at Christmas than laid up and boobless, unable to lift my kids. Oh, the things I do for you, cancer. Heart you!

3 comments:

  1. wow, so much to do, think about, decide upon, ponder over, blah blah blah...........thank goodness you're an intelligent person and able to handle it all. and you are handling it, even though some days you probably don't think so. keep strong and research the hell out of your c-rid............Carissa McCart Taylor WILL prevail. xo

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  2. Much as I admire Dr R, I am confident that the choice you have made to have the radiation first is the right one. Now, about getting tattooed ...

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  3. Let's hear it for the girl ... dressed up and "fit to kill" yesterday you looked just as gorgeous as you looked before the c-dawg crapped on your door step, even more so when I know what you are going through.

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