Wednesday, March 23, 2011

And take it to the left, and hold....

Four weeks in and I'm getting tired of not being able to reach for or lift shit. I know six weeks is the magic number for getting some decent mobility back, but the whole "stretch, but not 'til it hurts!" instructions are frustratingly vague.

I can almost reach up (way up!) with my right arm - enough to shave, get a salad bowl, fetch the bag of Hallowe'en treats still lingering in my linen closet. My left is another story. Because one of the "areas highly suspicious for invasive ductal carcinoma" was on the outer edge, they took so much skin on that side that I've got this bat-wing thing going on (goodbye armpit modeling career). I can reach about half as far as my right and it burns, baby.

The numbness is going away on my chest but it's still there on the back and underside of my left arm. The doc says it might always be there, which is less distressing than I thought it would be. It feels funny/painful when I brush my pony out in the morning or when someone grabs me by the arm while I'm trying to shoplift at the Bay, but no biggie. Cancer vs. numbness. We know who the clear winner is there.

Things I'm rather sad about are not being able to do yoga, sleep on my side or lift/carry my girls. Frances has reworded her daily ask from "can you carry me?" to "can you hold me and walk?", thinking I might get fooled, but as cherubic as face is, I know I'd rather wait than risk permanent damage.

I'm doing my exersausages every day, but may end up calling a physio or signing up for rehab at the six-week mark so I can take everything to the next level. I gots marathons to run, people!

4 comments:

  1. Okay, I laughed out loud at this one...

    "goodbye armpit modeling career"

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  2. You know, Babes? When you write the way you have here it shows your "true grit". You have been through more sh** than most women of your age - but you have kept that quirky sense of humour all along. It shows in posts like this one. For those who have not had cancer, it tells them that if they are ever diagnosed with it, they can choose to turn the bad news around. It is serious and needs to be taken that way, but you have made it so that it can help them get in touch with themselves and others like never before. For those of us who have had cancer it is like a breath of fresh air to see someone talking through the tough stuff - making it also easier for us to relate our fears and other feelings to our peeps.

    Any life threatening disease is very scary, but you have taken yours by the throat and shaken the bejeesus out of it! I'm proud and happy to be your Mom and I quote Diana Krall, "I love you just the way you are".

    Oh, and I thought I'm sure I taught you that shoplifting was a bad thing!!!!

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  3. Ditto Maggi! Me too! Where DOES she come up with these thoughts? LOL.

    Ditto Mom. Carissa, you said it all.................you have shown everyone what it's like to take the bull by the horns (shit, I'm showing my age) and deal with what you've been dealt...and WIN.

    Thanks for the update. I think of you daily and how you are coping. Rewording never hurt anyone....sometimes it works. Smart Frances, but smarter you.

    Keep up the good work and keep writing! xo

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  4. Is armpit modelling a play on George Constanza's hand modelling career?

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